May 9, 2012
The Trials of the Dentist

This fucker still isn’t flossing. God damnit. What an asshole. Swore me up and down that he was gonna start. I even gave him a shit load of those flossing picks but no. He doesn’t have 25 seconds to spare.    

Bleeding all over my shit…Oh you “try to floss every once in a while?” Bitch I look at teeth all day. You think I don’t know flosssing? Flossing? Come at me with something real. Show me tooth decay or root canal or some shit. Motherfucker thinks I don’t know flossing…    

Fidgety ass bitch. You got a tiny mirror and a metal toothpick in your mouth. Get over it.

Look. I get it. You don’t want to be here. But imagine if you heard, “Oh my god I hate seeing the [Matt McCarron]. UGH! Nothing worse. I only have to see him twice a year, but goddamnit do I dread those days.”

Did this bitch really just say that Mr. Sucker sucks too much?